As you can tell it's been a while since I posted! I've made a couple of blogs and haven't gotten into the grove of blogging, mostly because I don't enjoy self reflection. Same reason why I don't journal hardly anymore. And that thing called time. Go figure.

I can't honeslty write much because I'm slowly fading here at nearly 1am. I was soooo tired this morning I was dozing off while the kiddos watched some shows with their cousin Lyric :-) And yet I'm still up because it's quiet and it's me time. Megan, our newest addition is awake and happy at the moment, but momentarily I'll be scooping her up for a diaper change and nursing in bed.

I have a ton on my mind. I don't want to complain and I always write about wanting to change, but never do it. So, I'll spare those things and say that I love my family and I love my life. I want to figure out HOW to actually behave like that is the case. I am such an angry, grumpy person it's awful. I know it's largely feeling overwhelmed. But why am I so withdrawn from my kids?! I hate writing that this is the case. UGH. Okay, tomrrow is another day. My brain feels like mush.

I am grateful for:
1. My brother Patrick.
2. Learning about ways to make us happier/healthier like laughter, energy healing, nutrition, etc.
3. Forgiving children and husband.
4. Husband that's willing to work hard and be in pain so that we can have a roof over our head.
5. My amazing body and the ability to bring human life into this world.
6. Friends that share their experiences so that I feel motivated/inspired.
7. Being happily married- being unhappy in our marriage SUCKS.
8. My children's imagination and enthusiasm that seems to have left my grown-up self.
9. Parents that care about me, how I feel, what I'm doing, LOVE and interact with our kids, etc.
10. Heavenly Father and Mother, my Savior, the Spirit.